Journey To Teacher Training
In two days, I’m starting my eight week journey from yoga student to yoga teacher.
It’s been ten years since I went to my first yoga class with my mom. I can’t tell you what we practiced, where my hands stopped on my way to touching my feet in forward fold, or where the class was. But I can confidently say that taking that first class changed me. I might not have walked out feeling exhilarated, I didn’t come out with any realizations about the way I was living my life, I didn’t connect to some higher being. But that first class has led me to this point, two days away from something that will deepen my practice into something much bigger.
Some backstory. I’m 23-years-old. I’m from a suburb right outside of Philadelphia, I graduated from GWU in 2017, and I’ve been fortunate enough to be relatively healthy all my life. When I was eight, my parents split up as so many often do. Mental illness has played a huge part in my life over the past 15 years, but there were good times—great times—with the bad that made me who I am. It’s one of the biggest bridges connecting me to yoga. When I’m in the studio with a heavy heart, I can leave knowing that part of my worries, sadness, tears and sweat were left on the mat. I can walk out feeling lighter.
I’m now a full-time video production specialist and freelancer. When I was in school, I made my own schedule and worked when I wanted to. Now, with a 9-5 job, it’s difficult to focus my energy on anything besides being in this building all day. My life has become a 6am wakeup, 7am workout, 9am work, 12pm workout, 5pm home, 9pm bed. I needed something different. I needed something to build positive energy from within, rather than sitting at my desk everyday waiting for something good to happen to me.
So, two months ago, I signed up for CorePower Teacher Training to focus on one of the few things that bring me immense joy and peace when my brain is unable to handle the gut punches that life keeps throwing.
I am incredibly nervous. I’m nervous that, no matter how hard I try, I won’t be able to find the peace I’m looking for. I’m afraid of what people will think of me—what I will think of myself—if I fail or, even more horrifying, if I succeed. Training might be an eight week journey, but this practice is forever. If, after two months, I leave CorePower feeling at peace, where will the rest of my journey take me? Will I have the courage to make the life changes I so desperately want to make?
But I’ve also never been so excited. Yes, it’ll be awesome to post my handstand on Instagram and build a social community. It’ll also be incredible to see myself grow mentally and physically. And that’s why I’m starting to write. I want to look back on this post in two months and see that something—anything—has changed within me.
So, here we go. Two days until training starts. Two days until I dive, headfirst, into something that will undoubtedly, for better or worse, be a huge step toward reaching my goal of self-love and peace from within. I’m ready.